God save us it's SPLOOSH!
by Sqrly-Diggin'-Witches
Summary: (I think u can tell it's Holes) If you thought you knew what insanity was, you are in for a shock! Rated for high levels of craziness! (Note: some of you may know me better as BURNIN CHURCH GAL)
1. Default Chapter

HELLO PEOPLE! We are the Sqry Diggin' Witches, and by sqrly we do NOT mean related 2 Twitch! We're reposting this cause there was obviously some confuzzleation before, and we're hoping that was because it was just plain to long. ENJOY!  
  
Disclaimor: HOLES IS A BOOK, by one Louis Sachar, who we have prayed to regularly for a sequel but he is yet to answer our prayer. *tear* We own nothing besides a back of wild sugar-high fire-sqrls from hell. Do u really want 2 sue us for THEM?!?  
  
This is rated for high levels of insanity. READ AT YER OWN RISK!  
  
Harry Potter: Scarred_Brit  
  
Ron Weasley: MagicWeaselBoy  
  
Hermione Granger: aNnOyInG_nErD  
  
Voldemort: HarryH8ter  
  
Albus Dumbledore: DumbDork  
  
Artemis Fowl: Fowl_Plotter  
  
Holly: Luver_ov_Acorns  
  
Foaly: HorsePower  
  
Zero: HoleyMoley  
  
Stanley: leezerdh8ter  
  
X-ray: RulrOvDiggers  
  
Zigzag: Zip_Zig_Zag  
  
Twitch: SqrlyStarCarLifter  
  
BarfBag: RattlerReaper  
  
Kissin'Kate: Flirt_n'_Fire  
  
Sam: MightyOnion  
  
Warden: kiLLeR*nAiLs  
  
Mr. Sir: SeedSucker  
  
Mr. Pendensky: Scare_the_Kids  
  
HoleyMoley23 has entered chatroom OMG  
  
HoleyMoley23: ello there!  
  
Leezerdh8ter has entered room  
  
Leezerdh8ter: OMG YER ALIVE!  
  
HoleyMoley23: ummmm.. what u xpect?  
  
Leezerdh8ter: well.. i dunno. Where r u?  
  
HoleyMoley: oh under some boat w/ a dead guy and a lot of rotten peaches  
  
RulrOvDiggers has entered the room  
  
RulrOvDiggers: BWA HAHAHAHAHA! Dig my hole!  
  
HoleyMoley: I AIN'T DIGGIN NO MORE HOLES!  
  
Leezerdh8ter: yeah. He's 2 busy eatin sploosh!  
  
RulrOvDiggers: R U TALKIN 2 ME! Btw wut's sploosh?  
  
HoleyMoley23: no.. *hides in hole* and sploosh is this nasty peachy rotten makes-u-hyper stuff I'm living off of! It's really quite good.  
  
Flirt_n'_Fire has entered the room  
  
Flirt_n'_Fire: GIVE ME YER $ OR I'LL KISS U!!!!  
  
Leezerdh8ter: hoo's that?  
  
RulrOvDiggers: OMG IT'S MR SIR!!!!!!!!  
  
SeedSucker has entered the room  
  
SeedSucker: wut u say boy? U mouthin me?  
  
Flirt_n'_Fire: I'll mouth u if u don't give me yer $  
  
ScarredBrit has entered the room  
  
ScarredBrit: heeeeeeeeeeeey. yer not deth eatrs!  
  
HoleyMoley: I'M GONNA DIE!!!!! *sploosh. bwa haha. Good 4 the soul.*  
  
Leezerdh8ter: uhhhh. is there crack in that sploosh?  
  
HoleyMoley: HOLES! SHOVELS! CRACK! BALROGS! SPONGEBOB! WIGGLES! EDGAR ALLAN POE! SNAKES! Bwa ha ha sploosh!  
  
ScarredBrit: snakes? EVAL! * hiss hiss hissy* PARSELBRAIN ATTACK! *twitches on ground*  
  
RulrOvDiggers: wut is that *bleep * talkin about?  
  
ScarredBrit: OMIGAD! You did not just say that grlfriend!!!  
  
MagicWeaselBoy has entered room  
  
Magicweaselboy: wut?!?!?!? Yer hermiones boyfriend?!??!?!!?!? ILL KILL YA..ooops...nvm..  
  
HoleyMoley: HOO R ALL THESE MAD PEEPS!?!?!?!?!?!  
  
Luver_ov_Acorns has entered the room  
  
Luver_ov_Acorns: *sigh * mudmen. they never change  
  
Leezerdh8ter: u shouldn't have said that..  
  
HoleyMoley: *deep breathe *  
  
RulrOvDiggers: TAKE COVER! HEAD 4 THE HOLES!  
  
HoleyMoley: MUUUUUUUUUUD! AAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! I AIN'T DIGGIN HOLES! NONONONONONONONONONONONONO  
  
Leezerdh8ter: wut really IS in that sploosh?  
  
HoleyMoley: NONONONONONONONONONONONO  
  
RulrOvDiggers: this isn't good. hey zero?  
  
HoleyMoley: NONONONONONONONONONONONONONO  
  
Leezerdh8ter: wait a tic! That's not right!  
  
ScarredBrit: ronny boy, I do believe we've found the deth eaters hide out!  
  
MagicWeaselBoy: THEY HIDE IN IM CHAT ROOMS!?  
  
HarryH8ter has entered the room  
  
HarryH8ter: I'VE GOT U NOW!!!! AVADA KADAVRA! Damn y can't I curse u in this lil box?  
  
ScarredBrit: HELP I'M DYING! *drops 2 floor *  
  
ANoYiNgNeRd has entered the room  
  
ANoYiNgNeRd: harry, I really don't think he can curse u in a chat room.  
  
ScarredBrit: ya no u have a point  
  
HarryH8ter: u'll never guess where r hideout is!  
  
Leezerdh8ter: I'm not following this, but in a hole?  
  
HoleyMoley: under a boat? *downs more sploosh*  
  
RulrOvDigger: inside that lipstick container?  
  
Harryh8ter: uuuuhhh. any1 else? How about u harry dear?  
  
ScarredBrit: 0_o  
  
MagicWeaselBoy: In "Lady's Knickers and Bras" discount store?  
  
Harryh8ter: DAMN HOW'D U NO??????  
  
MagicWeaselBoy: ohmigawd like really?  
  
HarryH8ter: like omg yes!  
  
MagicWeaselBoy: omg let's like go 2 the mall!  
  
HarryH8ter: like TOTALLY! GRLS NIGHT OUT!  
  
RulrOvDiggers: WAIT CAN I COME 2?????  
  
MagicWeaselBoy has left room  
  
HarryH8ter has left room  
  
ScarredBrit: O_O  
  
RulrOvDiggers: DANG!  
  
Leezerdh8ter: O_O  
  
HoleyMoley: geez x-ray, I never woulda thunk. wait I mean NONONO  
  
ANoYiNgNeRd: ron's gay! I never saw it coming! Voldie on the other hand. the pink robes kinda gave it away. (A/N NOT MINE! NONONO NOT MINE! Humor genius Krissy's!!!! have I made that clear?)  
  
ScarredBrit: 'mione, I do believe ron's been tempted over to the dark side!  
  
AnoYiNgNeRd: I do believe yer right jolly old chap!  
  
ScarredBrit: Tea Time! Coughcough snogging break coughcough  
  
ScarredBrit has left the room  
  
AnoYiNgNeRd has left the room  
  
]----D haha see a shovel! well kinda when you squint. . .  
  
ok anyways how was it?!?! Bad? Funny? Read, review, get on with your life! Think of it in these terms: it's better than digging a hole. Hey, positive feedback and we just might continue! ;-)  
  
HoleyMoley: review and I might consider parting with a bit of my sploosh!  
  
Ok you heard the mole peaches are to be gained! Aw come on you know you want to.  
  
3 the Holes Addicts, one of which also happens to be a pyro  
  
Notice: No mop-headed moles were harmed in the making of this fanfic. Wait, or were those curly-wigged worms?  
  
HoleyMoley: *growls and foams at mouth* note the name, I'm a MOLE! 


	2. Health Class Rule 1: Peaches from the 18...

Hey again fellow obsessers! Here is chappie Two!  
  
Disclaimer: No me own-ee. If I did would I be writing fanfiction? Didn't think so.  
  
Now when we last left the pathetic lil HoleDiggers and Company, the Hogwarts personel had just left the chat room for tea! *coughcough*  
  
LeezerdH8ter: wait a tic.. I've been thinking  
  
RulrOvDiggers: this isn't good. EVERYBODY FIND A HOLE!  
  
Luver_Ov_Acorns: really? I didn't think mudpeople thought!  
  
Fowl_Plotter has entered the room  
  
Fowl_Plotter: really holly? I thought working beside a genius would have taught u that much! But I guess I overestimated u. as always  
  
Luver_Ov_Acorns: U R SO GONNA PAY U PASTY FACED MUD WEASEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Flirt_n'_Fire: GET 'IM! GO SIC 'IM! SIC 'IM! Need a gun?  
  
Luver_ov_Acorns: woa.. Hoo is this crazy gal?  
  
RulrOvDiggers: we dunno 4 sure, but we're pretty certain it's Mr. Sir!  
  
SeedSucker: WUT U SAY BOY!?  
  
RulrOvDiggers: uhhh. nvm!  
  
Leezerdh8ter: *pout* I've been trying to say something now 4. how long?  
  
SeedSucker: extra hole 4 u 2morra x-ray!  
  
RulrOvDiggers: caveman.. Extra hole 4 u 2morra!  
  
Leezerdh8ter: BUT THAT'S NOT FAIR!!!!!!!  
  
RulrOvDiggers: DIG MY HOLE OR I KICK YER ASS!!!!  
  
Leezerdh8ter: put it that way.. U need rescueing zero?  
  
HoleyMoley: I AIN'T DIGGIN NO MORE HOLES! NONONONONONONO. wait I mean sure! Bwa hahaha SPLOOSH! *keels over as if dead* Leezerdh8ter: aw well. I'll go get 'im anyways  
  
Leezerdh8ter has left the room  
  
RulrOvDiggers: c every1 just luvs me! He's gonna kill himself 4 me!  
  
HoleyMoley: *from ground * ya think? *Giggle* hee hee hee my sploosh!  
  
KillerNails has entered the room  
  
KillerNails: ya no wut Sir, yer fallin' back on the job! U JUST LET 2 OV R SLAVES GET AWAY!  
  
HoleyMoley: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! We're all gonna die! We're all just gonna sit out here diggin holes till we ROT!!!!! And then, and then the BALROGS will come and we will all like go up in FLAMES! And after that, after that *gasping for breath* SLAGAR will come and we will all like DIG for Malkaris! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!  
  
Fowl_Plotter: wut r u ON?!?  
  
HoleyMoley: *giggle* yummy sploosh. good sploosh. sploosh will save us..  
  
Fowl_Plotter: HEY I READ THAT BOOK!!!!! Holes right?  
  
KillerNails: hoo r u? well hooeva u r START DIGGIN!  
  
HoleyMoley: bad holes! O0o0o0o c the pretty fireworks! Skip threw the tulips.  
  
Fowl_Plotter: if I remember correctly, in that book those peaches were from the 1800s!!!!!! wait a tic, something's not right!. I've been thinking.  
  
Leezerdh8ter: u've noticed wut's wrong with this picture too?!?!?!  
  
FowlPlotter: yeah. *glares* zero . . .  
  
Leezerdh8ter: ZERO U CAN'T READ!!!!!!!!!!!! HOW THE HELL R U WRITING????????????????  
  
HoleyMoley: *quickly changing subject* really? We're in a book? Cool! hey look at that it's barfbag!  
  
RattlerReaper has entered the room  
  
RattlerReaper: hey zero wut's up man?  
  
HoleyMoley: ta haha sploosh, sploosh sploosh everywhere!  
  
RulrOvDiggers: BARFBAG!?!?!?!?!?!?! YER DEAD DUDE! Oh well hoo cares DIG MY HOLE!  
  
RattlerReaper: *coughcough* well, uuuhhh. this guy in pink robes kinda pointed this stick thing at me and.. Uhh.  
  
DumbDork has entered the room  
  
DumbDork: that "guy in pink robes with the funny stick" was Voldemort dear boy! *thunder and lightning*  
  
HoleyMoley: WE'RE ALL GONNA DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE!  
  
look it's a hole! (not energetic enough to make my shovel)  
  
anyways yeah how was it? Pleaz let us know and if something just isn't clicking for you, tell us and we'll clear things up next chappie!  
  
HoleyMoley: NOW REVIEW! Come on make us depressed hole-diggers happy. . . you know you feel sorry for us!  
  
Ok you heard the Mole! Thanks!  
  
3 the Obsessives 


	3. Sploosh: combine the peaches, sugar and ...

AAAAANNNNNDDDDD . . . the Church is back! *creepy victory dance resembling scorpion having seizure* BWA HA HA HA prepare yerself for more hyper- activating!  
  
Disclaimor: I own nothing. HoleyMoley: Talk about quick and to the point! *more sploosh. . . yummy*  
  
THANKS TO ALL MY DEAR REVIEWERS! You don't understand how bright a review makes our day! :-)  
  
Celestra: OMG never try to separate Zero from his precious sploosh! I've tried and ended up on the operating table with a shovel imbedded in my head. *pout* Hee hee hee thanks, yes go me! *runs around in sqaures* Gr I hate it when my computer is down. I can only pray to the high almighty thumb for it to get fixed so you can write your ficcy! *hops in anticipation* Thanks so much for the great TWO reviews *shudders in excitement. . . omg I got 2 from the same person!!!!* well, as you can see I have obeyed the shovel and updated! If truth be told it was yer reviews that got me to! THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH! *hands Celestra some sploosh*  
  
Steph: glad you like it!  
  
Shae Elvin Heart (sp?): *fluffs a highly disgruntled Mole's hair* hee hee hee poofy! How do you know when X-ray's birthday is? Ha I remember in the book when Ziggy thought it was his birthday and was running around driving everyone nuts about it. . . hee hee hee  
  
Artemis Fowl II: alrighty everyone did you just hear this guy try and tell me to calm down?!?! *laughs at reviewers cluelessness* sorry pal, never try to make me calm down. It's a losing battle! Thanks for the review though!  
  
Lizzard: wow! Glad you liked it so much! :-) (shudder) ew just don't name yerself after those devilish lizards. . . they are gonna be the death of us all I just know it!  
  
Ellis McGuinn: Aw. . . my first reviewer *tear* Lol yeah, lots of peeps kinda missed something. A big something at that. That's why we devided the thing up and made it shorter. Hopefully you'll get it this time. Thanks!  
  
Eh, Man: ok, this is weird. I got a review from you in my mail box but it never showed up! *Shrugs* oh well thanks a load anyways! *chorus of agreement from animals* ok wow man feel loved those guys are very rarely positive, as you probably know all too well! *wink* well considering I bug u like at least 10 times a day as it is, I won't say much here. THANK YOU SO MUCH THOUGH!  
  
Alrighty then thanks again! If yer reading and not reviewing, all the lil diggers want you to review cause they are feeling depressed, cause stanley is really taking his time finding that treasure!  
  
Here's chappie three! Have fun!  
  
HoleyMoley: yer all nuts. . . *continues doing the Macarena* Wut the hell is taking Stanley so long? Bwa ha ha more sploosh!  
  
Fowl_Plotter: crazy people. I'm surrounded by crazy people  
  
Luver_ov_Acorns: wow genius boy. u only just figured that out?  
  
SqrlyStarCarLifter has entered the room  
  
SqrlyStarCarLifter: *twitch twitch* cars.. Cars... CARS...  
  
Fowl_Plotter: OH PLEAZ SOMEONE SAVE ME!  
  
Luver_Ov_Acorns: hee hee hee. I can do that! Must go find Foaly.  
  
Luver_Ov_Acorns has left the room  
  
MightyOnion has entered the room  
  
HoleyMoley: OMG AAAAAAAAAAAGH!  
  
RulrOvDiggers: wut? Or is it just that sploosh playing tricks on ya?  
  
HoleyMoley: THE DEAD GUY UNDER THE BOAT W/ ME JUST CAME TO LIFE AND HE HAS A LAPTOP!  
  
RulrOvDiggers: OMG!  
  
HoleyMoley: tell me about it, that laptop's better than mine!!!! :'-(  
  
RulrOvDiggers: -_-  
  
MightyOnion: I can fix that.  
  
Flirt_n'_Fire: SAMMY BOY!  
  
MightyOnion: omg quick someone hide me Kate's comin!  
  
RulrOvDiggers: kate? Kissin kate? OMG AAAAAAAAAAAGH! Make room under that boat zero! *runs head long into desert*  
  
Flirt_n'_Fire: come on sammy. let's u and me find a nice. quiet hole. just u and me. in the dark.  
  
MightyOnion: help! Quick afro-kid do something!  
  
HoleyMoley: HELP STANLEY!  
  
KillerNails: HAHA! He can't help u now! U 2 r just gonna sit out there and rot!  
  
HoleyMoley: *breaks down and sobs*  
  
SeedSucker: there r plenty of holes 2 choose from.  
  
HoleyMoley: *shudder*  
  
Scare_the_Kids has entered the room  
  
Scare_the_Kids: o0o0o0o0o0o can I play?  
  
HoleyMoley: grrrrrr. *starts twirling shovel like a sword*  
  
SqrlyStarCarLifter: *twitchtwitch* cars. O_o  
  
SeedSucker: well, that's 3 down in one day!  
  
KillerNails: good work troops!  
  
Scare_the_Kids: really? Another one left?  
  
Flirt_'n_Fire: yeah I scared one off. y is everyone scared of me? *applies more lipstick* oh onion boy!  
  
MightyOnion has left the room  
  
HoleyMoley: thank god he's dead again! Bwa ha ha sploosh! HIGH ON SPLOOSH! HIGH ON SPLOOSH! Crack is a very good thing!  
  
Flirt_n'_Fire: WUT!?! HOW'D U GUESS MY SECRET INGREDIANT?!?!?!?!?!  
  
HoleyMoley: *cackles and runs in pentigons*  
  
Scare_The_Kids: I thought people usually ran it circles, oh well what gives  
  
Flirt_n'_Fire: o0o0o0oo0o0o I will KISS U!!!!!  
  
HoleyMoley: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! STANLEY 4 SHOVELS SAKE HURRY UP! 


	4. The Ultimate AprilFools: Slip some sploo...

Hi again! Lizard season opened today! Just thought I'd let ya know. . . go shoot one and do us all a favor!  
  
Disclaimer: *rams head into desk* How I despise writing these. *sniff* shut up, I don't own them, don't have to rub it in. . .  
  
Aw wonderful saintly reviewers! *tries to give all reviewers hug but they wisely run away* I can't thank you guys enough!  
  
Celestra: OMG I can't believe I actually have peeps sticking with this story! Thank you so much for the great review! Oh yes writing is very good for you. . . (scans story based on instant messaging juvenile delinquents high on crack) But who is to argue with the shovel? See what happened to the last person to do so? *coughcoughPendenskycough* o0o0o0o0o0o *shatters jar of sploosh in anger* gr I hate it when comps lose info. I can only pray you get it back soon cause I WANNA READ! Well, uh, *turns to Zero* Is there such a thing as crackless sploosh? HoleyMoley: *hops in circles* "either they've invented some really strong sugar or nope there isn't!" :P heh heh, enjoy the story! *runs away*  
  
Shae Elven Heart: yes *sigh* Kissin' Kate really had the perfect plan going there. RUN CODY RUN! Here, something for the great review! *heaves giant mouse trap out of pocket* See, it's an X-ray trap! You just bait it with some peanut butter or something, and all you have to do is wait! *meanwhile is baiting Ziggy trap with some matches*  
  
Natalie: Thanx! No, I actually don't find Ron very gay, the story just worked better that way. He he he, me like Artemis too! *sobs* I am NEVER going to get over them wiping his memory in the 3rd one. Heh hope u've read the 3rd one. . . *starts edging away just in case*  
  
L: Glad you like it!  
  
Eh, Man: *grumbles* I HATE it when it doesn't send my really long reviews! And as we all know mine can get pretty long! :P Leezerdh8ter: "yes, everyone should listen to me! But do they? NO! *pouts*" Well, be thankful Man does Stan! *grins very pleased with her rhyming skill* HoleyMoley: *is having sploosh smoothie* "has anyone realized how many ways there are to eat rotten peaches? Hehe huggles, me like huggles. *sobs* Jaffy used to like huggles before I LOST HIM! *more sobbing*" Aw Zero it's ok man if I ever get my hands on any money I will get you a new Jaffy! *huggles, hehe I like that word!* GR! I still don't have The Guide *still have that burn on my hand* Life is unfair *pout* Animals: "He he we like huggles! *all hop up and down*" Now Zero I told you not to go giving the other guys sploosh! *glares* why don't you ever give me some? HoleyMoley: "god that's the last thing this website needs, burning with some sploosh! *keeps reading* Ok so I can't read! Don't have to rub it in! *keeps reading* Yeah, Stanley's actually kinda nice, when he stops making fun of my pronunciation of MaryLou." Leezerdh8ter: "ha ha MAR-YA-LOW MAR-YA-LOW *falls over laughing* but yeah, for some odd reason I kinda don't want my best friend dead. Sometimes I wonder why actually; I wouldn't have to teach him to read anymores." Ha ha ok the sqrls are kinda getting desperate for a cure. DON'T GIVE IT TO THEM! Animals: "*attack burnin*" Ok fellas shut up, the other peeps must be kinda looking for the story by now. Thanks again Man! And btw you have to update!  
  
Ok this is chappie. . . 4? Really? Wow cool. . . I am doing good!  
  
Scare_the_Kids: y is rex still online if he's in the middle of the desert trying to find zero w/ stanley?  
  
HoleyMoley: really he's looking for me 2? MY SPLOOSH AND I'M NOT SHARING! *growls and foams at mouth*  
  
Away Message From RulrOvDiggers: Sorry away digging a hole to Australia, b back soon!  
  
Scare_the_Kids: well that explains that!  
  
DumbDork: if u don't mind my asking, r u deth eatrs?  
  
KillerNails: deth eatrs. that has a good ring to it! *starts re-painting nails*  
  
SeedSucker: *shudder*  
  
HorsePower has entered the room  
  
Luver_Ov_Acorns has re-entered the room  
  
HorsePower: that's a great idea Holly!  
  
Luver_Ov_Acorns: naturally!  
  
Fowl_Plotter: *nervously* wut have u guys done?  
  
Luver_Ov_Acorns: oh nothing! ;-)  
  
Fowl_Plotter: y am I hearing sirens?  
  
HorsePower: no reason!  
  
Fowl_Plotter: U REPORTED ME DIDN'T U!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Luver_Ov_Acorns: maybe.  
  
Fowl_Plotter: U R SO DEAD! HELP BUTLER!  
  
HorsePower: haha this is fun!  
  
Fowl_Plotter: u will so pay! *is dragged away by police*  
  
Luver_Ov_Acorns: this is the greatest moment of my LIFE!  
  
Away Message From Fowl_Plotter: off stealing fairy gold. b back soon!  
  
HorsePower: *falls over laughing* omg they actually arresting him!  
  
Luver_Ov_Acorns: revenge is sweet.  
  
SeedSucker: y isn't this making sense?  
  
Scare_the_Kids: maybe 1 of the boys drugged those sunflower seeds?  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag has entered the room  
  
SeedSucker: ZigZag. . .  
  
KillerNails: ZigZag. . .  
  
Scare_the_Kids: Ricky. . .  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: y is every1 looking at me?  
  
RattlerReaper: haha good one ZigZag! Y didn't u do that while I was around?  
  
SqrlyStarCarLifter: *twitch* cars. *twitch* o_O  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: barf bag? AAAAAAAAAAAGH! U've come bak 2 kill us all!  
  
SeedSucker: y is everything turning yellow and pink?  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: *struggles 2 keep straight face*  
  
RattlerReaper: omg wut u put in it????  
  
HoleyMoley: *staggers around* sploosh. sploosh. dandylions. wiggles. dora the explorer.  
  
RattlerReaper: wow. zero's still alive. thought he died from a sploosh overdose a while back.  
  
KillerNails: yeah me 2. he hasn't said anything in a while  
  
HoleyMoley: look at all the pretty pretty shoes with the pretty pretty red Xs. the lil shovels r all dancing in the flowers. fa la la la la la la!  
  
SeedSucker: and now all the lil shovels r singing.  
  
HoleyMoley: and all the pretty shoes are doing ballet.  
  
RattlerReaper: U PUT SPLOOSH IN IT!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: *falls over laughing*  
  
KillerNails: *gasp* ZigZag!  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: *innocently* wut?  
  
SqrlyStarCarLifter: cars. *twitch* O_0  
  
RattlerReaper: did u give some to twitch 2?  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: no. he's always like that  
  
KillerNails: yer trying to avoid me ZigZag.  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: well, wut's different about that? I suffer from extreme paranoia remember?  
  
KillerNails: yeah. that scared look u have makes u pretty cute.  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: O_O  
  
HoleyMoley: I luv u, u luv me.  
  
SeedSucker: we're a happy family!  
  
HoleyMoley: w/ a great big hug.  
  
KillerNails: omg.  
  
Scare_the_Kids: GOD PLEAZ GIVE ME SARS NOW!!!!!! 


	5. Sploosh may induce visions of wild packs...

Hi again people! OK who here has finished OotP? Cause I have and am officially in deep depression. BURN VEILS!!!!!! THEY ARE EVAL! Ok shutting up now.  
  
THANK YOU WONDERFUL REVIEWERS! *runs around distributing cookies and air rifles with which you can shoot holes in veils!*  
  
Celestra: *bounces excitedly* ok ok, name the shovel! um. . . Snignet the Unstopable! (don't ask, your healthier this way) hee hee hee I think I might still be under the influence. . . OF SPLOOSH! *hops* what's your shovel's name zero? HoleyMoley: I dunno. . . Knarl the Killer! Why a knarl? HoleyMoley: cause they resemble hedgehogs and that's the closest I could get to a mole! Whatever makes you feel good zero. . . well anyways I can't wait for your stories to get up and thank you so much for the pretty review! *strokes review, which I have decided resembles a Puffskein*  
  
Man: the ever faithful man-who-is-an-authoress *giggles in disturbing fashion* woa that was a long review *reads review* AGH typoes should die! *shudder* Leezerdh8ter: what you do now *reads and faints* Heh heh I meant stan the man *shudder* if I could type my life would be easier Huggles are a cure for sploosh addicts huh? Why am I not buying this? ;-)  
  
HoleyMoley: HA you heard her you are no longer allowed to make fun of my reading skills! Leezerd8ter: lack of reading skills you mean *snigger* HoleyMoley: *runs to man expecting huggles* Uh, yeah. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR PRETTY REVIEW! *huggles for kate and lynne!*  
  
Ok now friends, read, review, get on with your life. If I knew how to do italics the term "review" in that phrase would be stressed! HERE IT IS!  
  
KillerNails: anyways moving on. that hair ZigZag. it's so. adorable! *squeals*  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: *breaks into a sweat* H-h-hey Barfbag?  
  
RattlerReaper: *laughing insanely* yeah?  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: pleaz tell me u took my idea and gave some sploosh to the warden?  
  
RattlerReaper: *falls off chair in mirth* nope. sorry!  
  
KillerNails: COME ON HONEY. PUCKER UP!!!!  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: THERE BETTER BE PLENTY OF ROOM UNDER THAT BOAT ZERO!!!!!!!!  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag has left the room  
  
KillerNails: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! SWEETHEART COME BACK!  
  
Scare_the_Kids: YES another one down! High fives all around!  
  
SeedSucker: . and a kiss from me 2 u!  
  
Scare_the_Kids: STOP SINGING, I BEG U! is everyone here related to that kate person? First the warden, now mr. Sir!  
  
HoleyMoley: look it's stanley! HE FOUND ME! I'M SAVED!  
  
Leezerdh8ter has re-entered the room  
  
Leezerdh8ter: told u I'd save ya zero! And plus now x-ray won't kill me!  
  
HoleyMoley: *cackles* let's celebrate. with some sploosh!  
  
Leezerdh8ter: *grabs jar* cheers!  
  
RulrOvDiggers: hey guys! Give me some! And while yer at it DIG MY HOLE!  
  
Leezerdh8ter: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!  
  
HoleyMoley: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! NONONONONONONO!  
  
RulrOvDiggers: BWA HA HA HA HA!!!!!  
  
HoleyMoley: *passes out*  
  
Leezerdh8ter: 2 BIG THUMB! *flings zero onto shoulders like sack of patatoes*  
  
HoleyMoley: *wakes up* ow. YAY PIGGY BACK! Weeeeeeeee! Faster faster!  
  
Leezerdh8ter: *stops dead* piggies. the curse. AAAAAAGH! *runs around like druggie poodle*  
  
SeedSucker: all the pretty purple piggies in their pink wiggies wiggle there toesies and.  
  
Scare_the_Kids: wait for me ZigZag! *charges into desert but falls into hole*  
  
KillerNails: OH NO U DON'T! u have 2 stay here and torture children with me!  
  
Scare_the_Kids: ok fine u talked me into it!  
  
Luver_Ov_Acorns: *puts feet up on desk* this is even more entertaining than yer world domination video games Foaly!  
  
HorsePower: *downing numerous bags of popcorn* yer right. 4 once I have to admit defeat!  
  
HoleyMoley: WEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Fun fun! Giddy-up horsie!  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag has re-entered the room  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: *under boat* hey x-ray where r caveman and zero?  
  
RulrOvDiggers: oh they're off playing rodeo on top of some giant thumb I guess.  
  
KillerNails: sweety! I knew u'd come back!  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: *shiver* well u can't come and snog me out here!  
  
KillerNails: VIRTUAL! *makes make-out noises*  
  
RulrOvDiggers: wut's this stuff. oh this must be the sploosh zero was talking about. *licks at it, then begins gulping the whole thing down*  
  
RattlerReaper: QUICK ZIGZAG GET IT AWAY FROM HIM!  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: *glances over at x-ray* sorry, 2 late.  
  
RulrOvDiggers: ON TOP OF BIG-THUMBY!  
  
HoleyMoley: ALL COVERED IN ONIONS!  
  
Leezerdh8ter: I LOST MY POOR SHOVEL.  
  
SeedSucker: uhh. wut rhymes with onions?  
  
HoleyMoley: FUNIONS!  
  
SeedSucker: ok! . TO A PACK OF WILD FUNIONS!  
  
Leezerdh8ter: a pack of wild funions stole r shovel?  
  
HoleyMoley: NOOOOO! MY SHOVEL! [insert power puff theme] MAKE WAY FOR THE MIGHTY SHOVEL! (A/N Knarl the Killer hee hee hee)  
  
Scare_the_Kids: PLEAZ BARFBAG GET A RATTLER 4 ME! (A/N I can't remember his real name. Sorry!)  
  
RattlerReaper: uhhhh. ok! *disappears than reappears holding rattle snake*  
  
Scare_the_Kids: *grabs snake and digs its fangs into arm* oh THANK U! *tries to snog him*  
  
RattlerReaper: HEEEEEEEEEEELP! *disappears YET AGAIN and reappears under boat*  
  
Zip_Zig_Zag: HAHA! That's worse than me!  
  
Scare_the_Kids: *keels over and dies*  
  
Scare_the_Kids has left the room 


	6. hey, it's all coming together! who knew?

OMG ALL I AM SOOO SORRY! I haven't updated in like forever! Geez I bet a load or you have dropped this. Can u ever forgive me? *is pelted with onions* heh, well, maybe not. But please try! *puppy eyes*  
  
ANYWAYS thanks reviewers! *tosses peach smoothies into crowd* HoleyMoley: wut about me??? They make you sick smart one HoleyMoley: um. . . SO? ':o/ -- see it's raising an eyebrow! ^_^ ahem.  
  
CELESTRA: the ever faithful! Lol! Yea, naming shovels after mythical animals *shakes head at self* that could me considered a crime. HoleyMoley: off to camp with u! *hands burnin snignet the unstopable* Um, ok! *skips off to flirt with d-tent* thanks for the pretty puffskein!  
  
EH, MAN: the one and only savior of the world! *insert powerpuff theme* hee hee I was reading the funniest fic the other day called the HarryPuff kids. . . Harry: *shudder* it was inhumane I tell u! TORTURE! Voldie could take a leaf outa that author's book! *claps hands over mouth* oh god I hope that never get's back to him! *we see malfoy the wonderful bouncing ferret snickering in the background* AHEM yea. . . THANK U SO MUCH FOR THE PRETTY REVIEW! *tosses some sploosh* god they're getting like mine: freakishly long! Lol thanks for the time and energy put into that one. *all muses bow b4 the radiant review* say hi to lynne and kate for me! Horse n' Johnny: hey guys! Yea they say hi 2. Hey I'm back on the chat site! Hope u can get back on it soon 2. Hope u like this chappie!  
  
Ziggy the Paranoid Pyro: *grins very pleazed with herself* yay! I'm so glad people r finding this funny! This is the last chappie, hope it's a good one! *breaks into a sweat* JKR IS TRULY EVAL! *sobs uncontrolably* I've been obsessive compulsively reading number 3 since I finished, sobbing the whole say through. *sniff* POOR HARRY! How could she do that to him! Give the poor guy a break! I cried so hard when he lost it in dumbledore's office. I kept wanting to just hop into the book and hug him. *breaks down again, hugging black-lab build-a-bear mercilessly* Hm, but alas I'm in the holes section so I can't carry on like this. *sniff* thanks again for the great review! Hope u like this chappie!  
  
And to all others who are reading this and not reviewing! I forgive u cause I know it takes strength of mind to put up with such insanity. But think, if you leave a review it will prove that you read this and you will get full credit for your courage! *hint hint nudge nudge wink wink*  
  
AND HERE IT IS! THE FINAL CHAPPIE! Hope you all like it! *wrings hands*  
  
HoleyMoley: HIGH HO STANLEY! AWAY! Dang the sploosh is starting 2 wear off.  
  
SeedSucker: yeah same here. wait. HOW DARE ALL U LIL (bleeps)!!!!!! *continues ranting*  
  
Leezerdh8ter: *gasping 4 breath* mountain. higher. than. looks  
  
SqrlyStarCarLifter: *twitchtwitchtwitch* cars. O_X  
  
Leezerdh8ter: sorry zero yer getting 2 heavy. *drops zero into hole*  
  
HoleyMoley: *pout* *glances around* OMG HELP YELLA SPATTED LEEZERDS!!!!  
  
KillerNails: HAHAHA!  
  
SeedSucker: HOHOHO!  
  
Kid_Scaring_Specter: HEHEHE! (A/N yes all u thick ones a specter is a GHOST and yes this is Pendensky back from beyond the grave)  
  
SeedSucker: O_O  
  
KillerNails: Pendensky?  
  
Kid_Scaring_Spector: yup!  
  
KillerNails: *blinkblink* oh well, back 2 business; YER DEAD ZERO!  
  
HoleyMoley: *has lizards in his ears, caught in his hair, crawling down his pants* stanley. hey stanley? *Flips* HEEEEELP STANLEY!  
  
KillerNails: BWA HA HA HA HA!  
  
SeedSucker: told ya this was gonna happen boy!  
  
KillerNails: x-cuse me? I SAID THAT! *whips out nail polish*  
  
SeedSucker: *cringe*  
  
HoleyMoley: *can't talk anymore cause he has a lizard in his mouth*  
  
Leezerdh8ter: *on top of big thumb's nail* HEY I MADE IT! I'M ON TOP OF THE WOOOOOORLD! *starts rapping* Dig it up. *falls off * AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
KillerNails: hey, y'd he fall off?  
  
Flirt_n'_Fire: *grins and slips rifle back into pocket*  
  
Luver_Ov_Acorns: pass the popcorn Foaly. fetch me a soda, while yer at it?  
  
RulrOvDiggers: Dragon tails! Dragon tails! It's almost time for dragon tails!  
  
RattlerReaper: how long does it take 4 sploosh 2 wear off?  
  
HoleyMoley: 'ELP! 'ELP! I'ING 'ONNA 'IE!!!!!!!!!!!! *chokes on lizard*  
  
ScarredBrit has re-entered the room  
  
ScarredBrit: omg. chatroom cushy walls.  
  
ScarredBrit has left the room  
  
KillerNails: *glances out window* 0o0o0o0o00o0o look, a bus! It must be Zero's replacement!  
  
HoleyMoley: cough cough splutter cough cough!!! Translation: my replacement? Wut r u gonna call him, Negative One?  
  
SeedSucker: Well, here he is, our new slave.  
  
Kid_Scaring_Specter: hee hee hee slave!  
  
KillerNails: well, wut r u waiting 4 Sir? Go let him in and get him diggin!  
  
SeedSucker: *grumble* fine!  
  
Leezerdh8ter: AAAAAGH! *hits ground* ow.  
  
RulrOvDiggers: Scooby-dooby-doo! Where r u?!?!?!?!?!?!?  
  
RattlerReaper: maybe I should try this sploosh stuff.  
  
SeedSucker: *2 new kid* welcome to camp brownditch. well, quit starin', wut's yer name?  
  
New_Kid45: Artemis Fowl  
  
Luver_Ov_Acorns: OMG LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!  
  
HorsePower: *chokes on popcorn and dies in laughter*  
  
THE END! Pleaz R/R! tell me if you would like me 2 try to continue. Thanks to all readers for reading! ^_^ much appreciated. HoleyMoley: not really, unless they reviewed. . . *smacks zero* 


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